Silicon Valley Moms Blog

Mother's Day Card Shocker: "My Mom Loves Technology And Work.."

I woke up this morning to the sound of my three boys busting into the room - eager to share their Mother's Day gifts with me. I did not mind because I looked forward to my son's handmade gifts.  One of my 7 year old twin sons gave me a red card with cut out paper hearts that said simply: "I love you mom". My tween son played me a song on his guitar. Later that day we were going out to lunch with Grandmom and my husband was going to cook dinner. I was in mom heaven.

Then my other twin 7 year son gave me his handmade gift: a card with framed, painted Popsicle sticks that had a theme of "words about mom". I slowly read them: "Mommy, Happy, Smiles, Technology, love, type, T.V. and work".

What? I understand why my son would describe me by saying happy, smiles and love - but I needed more insight into how he came to describe me using the words technology, type, T.V. and work. Beyond the fact my son knows his mom is a technology blogger, I wondered if he thought that also defined me as a person. So I asked my 7 year old son why he used those words to describe me. He said:

Dealing With Grief, With Inspiration From SVMoms Group, Katie Couric and PBS

I just realized the other day that while I have been tech blogging regularly I had stopped blogging about my personal life. I wondered why? Then I realized I had gone underground on writing about my personal life because I have 3 relatives bravely fighting cancer (one of them is my father) and some other family members that have been ill. I found it hard to write about the absurdities of a mom pulling ahead of me at the school carpool line when I had just received a call that one of my relatives was not doing well after her last Chemo treatment. At the same time, I really wanted to vent by blogging about that mom in the big SUV that felt it was really important to pull ahead and cut me off in the school carpool line so her kid could get to school 2 seconds earlier then mine. But I also found it hard to write about my family's struggles with cancer.

Reading the powerful stories that my fellow SVMoms Group bloggers shared about their struggles with cancer finally helped me gain the strength to blog about my own struggles. I gained comfort and inspiration from reading their topic related posts including our Blogging for a Cause, American Cancer Society inspired Campaign for more birthdays", What to tell the kids about Cancer and our moms taking the pledge to fight cervical cancer. I also gained strength from reading our posts about how other moms deal with grief. Understanding how to deal with grief also helped me understand how to deal with sickness. Tonight (Wed April 14), at 8pm PBS will air a show titled “When Families Grieve” about an ongoing initiative to provide resources and information to parents and kids who are struggling with grief. Katie Couric is involved with the show and posted her thoughts on the New York City Moms Blog "Katie Couric: When Families Grieve".

Here are some of the other inspiring Silicon Valley Moms Group posts on Grief:

Alix from Silicon Valley Moms Blog: Medical Gaffes, Cancer, and Prevention

Jennifer from Silicon Valley Moms Blog: What are the Chances?

Angie from the Deep South Moms Blog: Matters of Life and Death

Farrah from Chicago Moms Blog: Coping with the Unknown

Melanie from Chicago Moms Blog: Talking to my kids about death

Mandi from Rocky Mountain Moms Blog: Generation Lost and Found

Sandie from DC Metro Moms Blog: Talking to Kids about the D-Word, Parenting Through Grief, My First Orphaned Birthday

I also related to Paige's post (from Silicon Valley Moms Blog) about the grief she experienced after finding out that one of her favorite newspaper columnists had passed away: I Miss You, Holly Hayes. It made me think back to when Herb Caen, a columnist from the San Francisco Chronicle, passed away in 1997. I felt as if a friend had passed and that I would miss him as well. I still find myself repeating his quotes such as "A man begins cutting his wisdom teeth the first time he bites off more than he can chew" (by Herb Caen).

Beth Blecherman is a Co-Founder of the Silicon Valley Moms Group. She rants and raves about the intersect between technology and family life on her personal blog TechMamas.com and on Twitter as TechMama.

"P-Section" And Other Extreme Themed Halloween Pumpkins Any Snarky Mom Would Love

Image via Wikipedia

As I look at the 5 carved and mildly moldy pumpkins sitting on our porch, I was relieved that my kids decorated for Halloween. I did not plan for our family to carve pumpkins, but I - like Lisa from Silicon Valley Moms Blog - was influenced by my kids enthusiasm to participate in Halloween. I am not one of those moms that enjoys doing cute crafts for holiday occasions. I like holiday crafts that are practical (.i.e. family calenders) or something on the humorous side. So I looked for all types of pumpkin carving patterns and pumpkin designs. After seeing the humorous and extreme pumpkin designs online, I felt myself gaining a deeper appreciation for Halloween crafts.

At first I saw some practical and humorous pumpkin designs on the Mashable's "12 Awesome Social Media Halloween Pumpkins". Then I saw a design Kerry R Feller tweeted from ExtremePumpkins.com inspired by a C-Section called "P-Section". As a mom that had a C-Section for the birth of twins, I can verify that the pumpkin had the right amount of realistic touches without going overboard. Any mom whose household has gone through the stomach flu would appreciate the puking pumpkin design I found on MamaGloss.

Moms, Celebrities and Twitter: The Video

Who's Following You on Twitter? @ Yahoo! Video

It seems more then ever moms are using Twitter to share what they are doing and see what their friends are up to. Twitter is a service that allows people to share "what they are doing" in 140 characters, which keeps people brief. And if that is not enough, moms are sharing their pictures on Twitter using Twitpic and their stories on Whrrl.  Twitter adds to the list of the online social networking and blogging activities moms are doing during the short amount of time they have to themselves. But a guilty pleasure has also developed among many moms who follow Twitter: following celebrities. Following celebrities on Twitter and Twitpic gives me a chance to catch a glimpse of what they are up to on a daily basis. For example, I can view a picture of Demi Moore shoe shopping or see a glamorous dress she is wearing while I (unglamorously) fold laundry. I can also get a good laugh reading Twitter jokes by Heather McDonald, Chelsea Lately show and Jimmy Fallon. I can even follow a verified Twitter account for Barack Obama.

Jane Maynard from This Week for Dinner was a late-comer to Twitter and is still building up her celebrity list of followers (current tally is somewhere around zero). She shared this Twitter story with me:

"The highlight of my Twitter career thus far was when Hugh Grant started following me. Yes, THAT Hugh Grant...Actor/Writer/Producer/baked bean thrower. Okay, so maybe it wasn't really Hugh (who has since disappeared from Tweetland), but if Santa Claus is a follower, why can't Hugh Grant be one to? And, in case you're wondering, I did NOT follow Mr. Grant back."

I was thrilled to learn two of my favorite celebrities Jane Fonda and Katie Couric are not only blogging, but are on Twitter. After I followed Jane Fonda and Katie Couric I received a big surprise when they followed me back. It is this type of interaction that makes Twitter so addicting. Jane Maynard and I also share a fascination with looking at pictures posted on Twitter.

Suicides, Surprise And Sadness in Palo Alto

At a time which would normally be filled with Graduation excitement, many local parents and teens in the Palo Alto/Bay Area are feeling a deep sense of sadness and surprise that teens are taking their lives by suicide. On Thursday a boy tried to commit suicide at the SAME train tracks two teens recently killed themselves. All three students went to Gunn Highschool.

I went to Palo Alto Highschool and my brother to Gunn in the 1980's. I called my brother today to ask him if he remembered any suicides at Gunn, he said there was one suicide that he knew of.  I could not remember any suicides when I went to Palo Alto Highschool. We both felt so sad that this was happening in our childhood schools, but we could not figure out why a teenager would commit suicide. We know that depression can be overwhelming and teens are compulsive. But why suicide?

The Palo Alto Medical Foundation had this explanation:

Multiple Moms Madness: Kate Plus 8 Versus Octomom

I have watched the TLC reality show Jon & Kate Plus 8 (a family consisting of older twins and younger sextuplets) for the last year or so. As a mom of twins and an older sibling, I related to their challenges. I appreciated that Jon & Kate Gosselin showed the not so perfect side of parenting by losing their cool now and then. I reveled when they would discuss that with multiples there is always someone unhappy at any given moment, which describes my daily struggles. I stood up for Kate Gosselin when many said she was too controlling because the kids all looked well fed, dressed and overall happy. I saw the way Kate took care of the sextuplets when they were babies and thought that her nursing skills  were very helpful in treating the kids ailments. I aspired to be as organized as Kate was in planning out her days. The fact that Jon & Kate Gosselin invited cameras into their daily lives seemed to be the price they paid to earn enough money to stay home with their kids while upgrading their house to make room for their big family.

However, from the beginning, I dismissed the Octomom Nadya Suleman  (who now has 14 kids, the last octuplets) as a publicity hungry, Angelina Jolie wannabe, narcissistic person who had kids as props to further her fantasy of becoming famous. At the hospital after delivering her babies, Nadya Suleman had perfect makeup, long fake nails with a FRENCH MANICURE and an insincere way with the babies. Any multiple mom knows that you need to cut your nails short when taking care of infants. I felt nothing but pity for her kids.

But Nadya Suleman really lost points in my eyes when she "dubbed Kate Gosselin 'a cheater' for relying on plastic surgery to get her bod back in bikini shape". As many multiple mom I know believe, tummy tucks should be a standard medical expense after having multiples.

I can't wait to see the natural methods that Nadya Suleman uses to get in shape.

I even made a joke while lying on the operation table, loopy from anesthesia during my C-Section delivering twins. I said, "Hey doc, can ya do a tummy tuck while you are in there?" My doctor did not think it was funny.

But lately with all the new scandals I feel as though I lost some close (reality TV) friends.

ROE: The Business Case For NOT Having A Tidy House

As I write this blog post after the kids are in bed, there are dishes to be emptied out from the dishwasher, loads of laundry to do and baskets of clean laundry to fold. There are pillows from the sofa in the living room on the floor after they were used for my three boys to build forts. There are toys to be picked up and vacuuming to be done. Instead, I am sitting in bed writing this blog post. Why? Because it all comes down to a term I made up to help me quantify my priorities as a mom: "ROE" (Return on Energy).

As any mom knows, being a parent is a life changing experience when it comes to priorities. Every day from morning until night my kids health and happiness are the top priority. But when it comes to having a perfectly clean house - I have developed a different measurement system. Daily household chores include bleaching every bathroom down (anyone with boys understands that), endless laundry, feeding kids and cleaning the kitchen. After that, the priorities need to measured against ROE. Do I fold clean clothes in the basket or write a blog post that is helping me developing my career 2.0? Do I vacuum and Swiffer the floor today or spend time learning about using my new DSLR to take pictures during my upcoming blogger event? Where should I put my limited energy after taking care of the kids?

The time spent learning about ROI in college has paid off by providing me with a framework to prioritize my time as a work at home mom. I have separated out what chores must be done each day versus the chores that can wait. This has given me more time to work at home, which includes participating in social media (like blogging) that is important for my career 2.0.

My ROE process was kept in the closet until I attended an inspirational talk this week by Joanna Strober, co-author of Getting to 50/50: How Working Couples Can Have It All by Sharing It All. She shared something at that talk gave me the strength to come "out of the clean closet":

Yes TechCrunch, Oprah And "Social Media Savvy Moms" Will Take Over Twitter

While reading my RSS Feeds today, I saw a blog post title coming from my TechCrunch feed - "Oprah’s First Tweet Will Be Tomorrow On Her Show. Soccer Moms To Take Over The Service?".

I am not surprised Oprah joined Twitter, Facebook or that she will do her first tweet from The Oprah Winfrey Show  on April 17. Or that she will have Ashton Kutcher (@aplusk) on the show to talk about his Tweetrace to get 1 million Twitter followers and his pledge to fight Malaria in Africa. What I was surprised to see is the word Soccer Mom in the title of the TechCrunch post. I feel there are a few things wrong with the use of the word "Soccer Mom":

• Oprah has a huge following, made up of a wide range of people. Assuming that covering Twitter on The Oprah Winfrey Show will cause a mass movement of moms is missing out on the other aspects of her audience.

Bad Craft Karma, And I Have The Bloody Finger To Prove It

As I saw the glass fly from my hands - crashing on the floor of my minivan - I knew that once again my bad craft karma was haunting me. I can develop complex computer programs, speak at conferences, even clean myself up for important events - but doing craft projects at my kid's elementary school makes me loose sleep at night. The unknown of managing over 20 kids through a craft project is overwhelming.

This particular project was district wide and very well-organized. All I had to do was have the kids draw a picture and put it into some frames for the parents to keep. All the supplies were purchased and delivered. Instructions were clearly explained in a document that I had printed out to bring with me. I took a deep breath the morning before the project and told myself that this one would be different, it would go smoothly. But as it turned out, that was not so....

Silicon Valley Moms Group Partial Feeds - The "True Story"

Once upon a time when we started Silicon Valley Moms Group, we wanted to allow readers the options of viewing posts on our blog, through their readers (such as Bloglines, My Yahoo or Google Reader) or sent to their email inboxes. To allow this, we created web feeds of our "full" posts with nice little buttons to show the subscription choices. 

Unfortunately, many big bad wolves (sploggers) took our subscription feeds and set up their own blogs with our content (without permission). When we tried to talk to the big-bad-wolf-sploggers, they said they were just subscribing to our feeds (a lie, just like the big bad wolf in Little Red Riding Hood). But we were getting exhausted chasing after so many big-bad-wolf-sploggers.

In response to this, we had to change our nice "full" feeds to "partial" feeds, so if they wanted to load the feeds to their own blogs, just part of our posts would be shown. This action chased away the big-bad-wolf-sploggers but also inconvenienced our readers (which made us sad). Now readers can only read the titles of our blog posts in their feeds, but can easily click over to read the full posts at our blogs.  We hope that our readers will understand why we had to change to partial feeds - who wants wolves hanging around anyway?

And yes, we understand that this has upset many of our viewers.  We kindly try and respond to each and every one of you that we have offended or upset, and explain why (oh why) we moved to the partial feed.  And we REALLY understand your frustration.... really, we do! We promise that if you help us get rid of all the ugly, evil sploggers out there, we will (ahem) go back to full feeds... but until then.....

This is an original Silicon Valley Moms Blog post. When not chasing after big-bad-wolf-sploggers, Beth Blecherman is the Co-Founder of the Silicon Valley Moms Group. Her personal blog (TechMamas.com) discusses parenting and technology.

PS.  Follow SV Moms Group feeds on Twitter!