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June 01, 2006

My wife the blogging addict

The BA (Blogger's Anonymous) meeting started routinely enough.  I stood before the crowd and introduced myself.  "My name is Neil," I said, "and my wife is a blogging addict".

I must admit, it started out innocently enough with my wife as a once a week activity, but she quickly developed a serious blog habit.  She started stealing bandwidth from the kids and neighbors to support her “recreation”.  She hasn't used the other electronics in the house for months now.  She blogged about “blogging intimacy” three weeks ago. I'm considering hiring the Geek Squad for an episode of intervention.  Maybe I can just outsource the whole thing to a Mom writer in one of those call centers in India or China.  Our 3 year old twins now think a breakfast link is something you click on to see a picture of a menu from Hobee’s.

Yes, I watch my share of sports on television.  My wife has endured episodes of being a "World Series widow" and "Superbowl Widow" when I cannot be distracted by the mundane activities of raising children and being social.  However, two things happened that changed my (and my family's) life during sports playoffs:

1) Little kids:  Our two younger boys, 3 year old twins, mastered the remote at age 2 and know how to successfully switch the channel from baseball to Dragon Tails in the blink of an eye.  Combined with their older brother, there are three of them and they move like Superman or maybe "Dash" in the movie "The Incredibles".  I don't stand a chance.  All TV watching must now be done when the kids are asleep, which leads to item #2.

2) TiVO:  This is the best communications aid for marriages, bar none.  Forget the Mars and Venus thing.  I tell every guy I know who is getting married to stay away from the wedding registry at Macy's and register for TiVO.  "I have paused the TV, Honey, and am ready to hear your comments about the nutritional benefits of homemade vs. pre-made baby food.  Jerry Rice will, I am sure, catch the ball in the end zone as soon as I un-pause the TV."

But there is no TiVO for blogging.  It's 24/7/365 with no end in sight.  To be 100% truthful, I really admire my wife's dedication to blogging.  Contributing to and helping to manage the Silicon Valley Moms Blog really makes her happy.  It is an intellectual and social stimulation different from what she experiences in her other pursuits.  It's really fun to see her enthusiasm.

I am, however, very jealous of the notebook computer and am thinking of a QWERTY keyboard tattoo from neck to toes.  Left shoulder is the Q.  Right shoulder is the Z.