
"Motherhood. It's nothing like the brochure"
That is a little line I have been known to throw out to complete strangers from time to time. Like say you are the mom in the parking lot of Target holding a flailing, screaming toddler against all hope of getting the kid into the darn car seat. Your ponytail holder goes flying, you bumped your head on the car door, the kid is now hitting you and yelling at the top of their lungs "HATE MOMMY!". I walk by, you glance my way with a 'if you judge me right now I am gonna kill you' look...and I just smile and say my 'brochure' line or maybe even "Being a mom kinda sucks sometimes huh?". Hopefully you smile and think 'You mean it is okay to hate this part?'
Yeah. It is okay lady. Totally and completely OKAY.
Upon becoming a mother I read every book published on the subject. I subscribed to magazines with adorable children on the cover. I attended Mommy & Me classes. I learned how to sneak vegetables into my kids meals, I learned about the safest/bestest/trendiest strollers and I learned how much I was supposed to love every stinkin' moment of this new lifetime position as a mom. Apparently I was lucky to know more about pee and poop than my non human making girlfriends. I have say I didn't feel very 'lucky'. I felt kinda....stupid. I mean I wished for this? I prayed for this? THIS IS HARD. Why didn't anyone tell me this is hard WORK.
On the toughest of days (read: nearly everyday) I am stressed, frustrated and tired. I wonder how many people would jump on board a cruise ship knowing absolutely nothing about trip and then find out you can not get off the boat. No matter how badly you want to be skinny and well rested again. It's is a permanent gig. In other words, you can't put the toothpaste back in the tube any more than you can un-become a mother.
And yet. I find, underneath it all..... I love it. Even in the middle of my recent flu epidemic that brought the kids down and me up all night cleaning out puke buckets....I was happy. Okay not 'John Stewart asked me out on a date' kinda happy....but a different kind of happy. The kind of contentment and happiness that comes from working hard towards a goal. The goal of raising my offspring. The offspring that are certain to go on to do great things in this world. Like be great parents themselves. Will I warn them about just how HARD this parenting thing is going to be? Probably not. I mean why spoil the surprise?
Marcy Massura can be found enjoying the many sides of parenting at her other home The Glamorous Life Association. Stop by. Just step over the legos and laundry on the way in...
Original Orange County Moms Blog post.
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