I Blame My Mom For Everything

It is all her fault.  She set the bar so high I seriously don't know how I can get there.  I'm trying, believe me, but lately I just feel like it is taking every ounce of sanity and energy I have just to be the Mom she was to me. 

Over a decade ago my Mom and I made this deal, my husband (boyfriend at the time) and I would buy a large house with an in-law cottage and she would live there.  I could go out and have the career I dreamed of while she helped out with daycare.  She'd help me be the SuperMom I wanted to be.  She was the only other person I really felt I could trust to "raise" my children while I would be working.  But you see, she broke the deal and I will never forgive her for it.

Now I am stuck sitting here missing my Mom, trying to juggle working full time, raising my boys, being a good wife and somehow trying to maintain my sanity.  I'm just trying to be as good of a Mom to my boys as she was to me.  Some days I wonder if I'm doing enough or missing some critical aspect of mothering that I won't realize was missing until it is far too late, but when I look in the beautiful, loving eyes of my boys... I know I have to be getting most of it right.

With Mother's Day this weekend I'll be remembering how much my Mom means to me, appreciating every minute I had with her and everything she did for me in the time we had together before I lost her.

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