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03/26/2010

What we've got here is a failure to communicate

Tin_can_phone My daughter will be three in a couple of weeks. If she makes it that far. I might have to kill her first.

If the last few weeks are any indication of what three will be like, it's gonna be a long year. The attitude, the tantrums, the whining -- I don't know where to start my list of complaints. She's pushing me every chance she gets, and I'm not necessarily handling it with grace.

Last week I decided I would try talking to her. She's getting older, right? Surely she understands the reasons she should be good and do what Mama says. And surely she's now able to grasp consequences -- if you do A, then B will happen. If you fail to do A, then B is a privilege you will not receive.

Her favorite thing right now is Disney movies. Specifically Snow White. Which I have watched until I want to claw my eyeballs from my head. So I figured I'd explain that if she didn't behave herself, we would not be watching Snow White that evening. Simple, right?

I had a long "talk" with the child. I sat her down and told her all about the sort of behavior I expect from her, and that if I did not receive that sort of behavior, Snow White would be off-limits. She seemed to grasp this, as the whining about "No! Watch Snow White!" started immediately. So then I explained that if she listened to Mama and did what I asked, Snow White would be joining her that evening.

Capiche?

She nodded her little head.

"So," I said confidently, "If you listen to Mama, what will we get to do tonight?" I was certain she had understood every word I said and would answer, "Watch Snow White." A breakthrough would be achieved.

Her answer?

"Go swimmin'."

*Sigh.*

This is an original Ohio Moms Blog post.

When she's not trying unsuccessfully to carry on adult conversation with a two-year-old, Emilie Davis writes about the adventures of single motherhood at Doritos for Dinner.

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