NYC Moms

Desperately Seeking Baby Names

In about six weeks, I'll be having twins (a boy and a girl). And I'm thinking that they are going to need some names.

You know, sooner or later.

My husband and I are not so good at agreeing on names. We once had such a bitter dispute over names at the West Village restaurant, The Spotted Pig, that I’m sure you can now order the “Marital Discord Over Baby Names Burger.”

I pretty much throw out names that are super fabulous and he gives me the thumbs down.

And then he offers up some mediocre names and I’m like, I don’t think so.

Like the name Georgia. I just love this girls name. So one day, I brought it up. “Honey, I just adore the name Georgia for a girl. It’s so beautiful and gorgeous. Don’t you think?”

Here Comes the Boy. Should We Circumcise?

I've avoided the circumcision debate for a long time. My husband and I have two girls and I was happy to steer clear of this thorny issue. But now I'm pregnant with twins and well, one of them has an XY chromosome.

Did I mention that I have a Jewish husband? Oh yes. And that means circumcision is part of his religion, his culture, his history. This is going to get complicated.

Maybe the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) can help. But according to the AAP, the benefits aren’t strong enough to recommend routine circumcision for all male newborns and the organization leaves the decision up to parents. Hmm.... I guess they aren't taking sides.

Even the Dinosaurs Can't Take The Crowds During Vacation Week

My kids were recently on vacation from school and by "vacation," I mean that I had to come up with 10 million activities to keep them busy during the middle of winter.  And that's how I found myself at The American Museum of Natural History.

Look, I knew I shouldn't go. Not unless I wanted to be surrounded by...

A. A gazillion tourists and a billion local kids on school break.

B. Dead animals

C. Big old dinosaur bones

D. Obviously all of the above

But it was vacation. I was desperate. I decided to go for it.

On the way to the museum, my 5 year-old asked me, “Why did dinosaurs become extinct?” And I was stumped. 30 something years on this earth and I had no idea. I need to seriously learn more stuff.

We met my friend and her son at the museum. At first we couldn’t find each other on the 4th floor and thank goodness for cell phones so we could have a high tech conversation like this…

The Very Late Mom

I'm always early to pick up my daughter from preschool. I will run like a mad woman (so get out of my way) just to make sure I get there on time. I was raised by a single, working mom and I just remember that I was often the last kid picked up from preschool. I remember the waiting and then the relief and joy when I finally saw her face.  So if possible, I want to be on time whenever I can.

Except there is this little boy named Daniel who's in my daughter's class. During pick-up, all the 2 and 3 year-old's sit patiently on a mat waiting for their parent or babysitter. Their faces just light up when their person comes into the room. Except for Daniel's. Because his mother is always always late. And I mean, always.

Daniel just sits there. Waiting. Watching the other kids reunite with their mom or caretaker. His mother is not working long hours. From what I can tell, she is not pulling a double shift, trying to make ends meet. She is just late or distracted. One time she lost track of time when she was working at someone's home as a decorator. Sometimes she is just on her cell phone outside the school. She complains that the school is too far away and the turnaround too short.

My Daughter's Hidden Talent

My 5 year-old daughter has always been an artsy gal. She loves fingerpaint, pastels, water colors, anything that's messy. In fact, the messier the better.

When she was just a toddler, I had to pull her out of an arts class because the teachers kept forcing her to use a paintbrush when she just wanted to feel the paint between her fingers. I needed a class where she could be more free and I found one.

So it really surprised me when one of Dylan’s teachers recently told me that Dylan is a really good athlete.

My little painter is an athlete?!

“She runs really fast. She has great balance and agility. You should sign her up for soccer. She’s amazing during sports,” the teacher continued.

I'm even more surprised because I distinctly remember being picked last for dodge ball because all those flying rubber balls were really scary. And then I remember not making the field hockey team in junior high. And I blocked out the rest of my sports’ failures.

I finally settled on nice individual sport like skiing. No one throws balls at you when you’re skiing.

Uncertainty over the H1N1 Vaccine

I've been asking all the mothers I know. So are you vaccinating your kids against H1N1? Some are. Some aren't. Some mothers lower their voices as if they are discussing a taboo topic like abortion. They are afraid of being judged for their decision.

Mostly I hear a lot of uncertainty.

As for myself, I'm pretty pro-vaccine. Or at least I was a few weeks ago. I was all set to vaccinate my kids against H1N1. I was just waiting for the vaccine to arrive. But then my pediatrician said something that stunned me. She doesn't recommend it. "Too new," she said stoking every fear inside me about this nationwide vaccination program. This is a new pediatrician so I really didn't expect this. I thought every doctor was pro-vaccine.

The Flu Shot Just Got Trendy

I've been bombarded lately with emails reminding me to get my flu shots. Because flu season and H1N1 hysteria is upon us.

As if I could forget. You can't turn on the radio or the TV without hearing some scary swine flu story. Look, I get what doctors and "the experts" are trying to tell me. Flu shots are good. The flu is bad.  And I happen to feel comfortable vaccinating my girls, ages 2 and 5.

But here's the problem. Flu shots are the "must have" accessory of the season and many doctors' offices don't have them.

My pediatrician won't have the regular flu shot or the H1N1 shot until late October or early November. Same story at another pediatrics office. And my internist doesn't have them either. So I started calling the local pharmacies.

Roman Polanski Should Pay For His Crime

All kinds of big celebrities are now coming to the defense of former fugitive director Roman Polanski, demanding that he be freed. Polanski was arrested in Switzerland over the weekend after 32 years on the run. He was convicted of "unlawful sexual intercourse with a minor" in 1977.

So now big wigs like Wood Allen, Martin Scorsese and Harvey Weinstein have signed a petition demanding his release. And newspapers have described the crime as a "sex romp." I think everyone might be forgetting a few details of this case.

Polanski drugged a 13 year-old girl with a Quaalude and champagne and then RAPED her. According to the victim's grand jury testimony, this was not consensual sex. She said no. And he kept going. Raping her vaginally and anally. So why should he not have to pay for this crime? Because he's been living a fancy life in Europe for the past three decades?! I don't get.

The Mystery of Husbands

Sitting on my dresser is a blue gift bag. The kind of bag that I can easily reuse, relieving just a bit of my constant landfill guilt (I mean, where does all the garbage in the world go?! Ok, subject for a different post).

Inside the bag is a book from Barnes & Noble that my husband wants to exchange.  It was a gift for his 40th birthday.

But day after day, it sits on our dresser. My husband never touches it.

Despite the fact that there are 777 Barnes & Noble stores throughout the U.S. that would gladly take the book back. Yes, that’s the real number.

Ad he works in midtown. In fact, there is a store one avenue and two blocks from his workplace.

Yes, I actually took the time to look that up.

But the gift never moves.

One day, I can’t take it anymore because I find clutter simply maddening. So I pick the bag up and….

IT’S EMPTY.

EMPTY. EMPTY. EMPTY.

My Mother's Life with Burning Mouth Syndrome

A year ago, my mother was 65 years-old, full of energy and laughter and getting ready to pursue a dream, her Master's in Social Work.

But something went very wrong. The stress of the master's program was enormous. 25 year-olds were crumbling under the pressure and my mother was no different. Papers, tests, deadlines. Day after day. And my mother started getting sick. Very sick.

She developed something called Burning Mouth Syndrome (BMS), a chronic, stinging pain on her tongue. The pain is constant and never subsides. It is excruciating for her to eat anything. With this disorder, my mother also experiences extreme anxiety, depression, insomnia and other ailments. BMS occurs in less than 1% of the population and often effects postmenopausal women.