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May 06, 2009

If the Bra Fits (Congratulate Yourself)!

Bra I’ll admit, I don’t usually write about things like underwear. Or breasts. Mine or anyone else’s. Sharing embarrassing stories, like the time my pants’ seams gave way while shopping at Pier One and literally left me with no seat in my pants –thank god I was wearing real underwear and not a thong—aren’t topics I really like to write about. Not until today that is.

Today’s topic; bras and the breasts that go in them.

Who among us has actually got a bra that fits properly? I hear the grumbles out there. I can safely say that out of the dozen bras I do have in my closet, only one comes relatively close to fitting properly and even that fit isn’t perfect. At this point in my womanhood my body has shape shifted into almost every possible formation imaginable. There was the adolescent stick figure which warranted no breast support at all until my senior year in high school. My freshman year of college made its fast and furious appearance with stretch marks everywhere because apparently gaining 30 lbs in one year is too much for skin to handle. Ill prepared for the changes, I crammed myself into a C cup. Bad idea and certainly not a good fit for my D size. Come junior year the weight came off but the boobs stayed and although it may have been my best look to date, I didn’t appreciate them and still didn’t honor them with the right bra. If I only knew that I was in my body’s heyday.

Eventually marriage and baby and a chest truly worthy of porn; except engorgement isn’t the sexiest moment in one’s life and so the only action those beauties saw was either the tugging of a newborn or the ever seductive breast pump. Besides that they lived bound up inside a milky nursing bra. The years that followed my near Double D days have been a slow and steady deflation. Literally. Two children and many years later, my breasts are mere shadows of their various former selves. I’m not being self deprecating, just honest. Hence, the reason for my explicit breast time-line and the realization that if nothing else, it’s time I find a good, well-fitting bra.

Case in point, the other day my oldest daughter, now 11 and contemplating these sorts of things, caught a glimpse of my chest. The gap between my ill-fitting bra and my actual body was cavernous. She blushed and blurted out a “GOSH MOM! I mean…” and then she walked out of the room without finishing her sentence. My retort was yelling down the hall at her, “Gimme a break, I don’t have a bra that fits right”. How ridiculous a statement is that? And quite honestly, there is no reason for it. If I spend $40 on a bra then why on earth don’t I take the time to get one that makes me look the best that I can look and makes me feel good about what I’ve got going on—if you catch my drift?

And just in the nick of time, Macy swoops in with their bra fitting campaign. Yay Macy's! Help is on the way ladies.

So, let's have it? Are you too in need of a bra that fits? If so, leave a comment here. I’ve got a $20 gift card for Macy’s up for grabs which might give you that gentle nudge to get yourself all situated with a proper fitting and help with buying the bra that really fits!

Original post for LA Moms Blog.

Tracey Clark blogs about everything but underwear at Mother May I. She is also a photographer and the founder of Shutter Sisters where there is no talk of underwear either.


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