Chicago Moms Blog

Movin' On: Helping Preschoolers When Friends Move Away

We just got word that our closest friends in Chicago are moving. Moving back East, moving away from here, moving away from us. I am so sad - of course I am - these friends are loyal and kind, and they understand the challenges of raising a young family far from the benefits of grandparents and extended family. I can't count the times that one of us has come to the other's aid, watching the kids when a husband was supposed to be home in time for an appointment or a meeting, or doing a weeknight dinner together when the husbands were both traveling. And what about all the fun we had? Adjusting to their departure is going to be major.

But enough about me.

Motherhood Makes You Powerful

Motherhood has made me bolder than I ever thought possible. Perhaps it just comes with the territory, but 3 years of caring for my son has created a defensive/offensive place inside me: For him, yes, but also for myself. About a year ago I put this defense-offense strategy into play at a critical time in my life. After a long year and a half of trying, I became pregnant with our second baby. I was determined to give myself a truly fair chance at having a vaginal birth. Our son was delivered by c-section, and my recovery was extremely uncomfortable, both physically and emotionally. I know many, many women who have recovered easily from c-sections and would choose that birthing method again. In fact, 6 of the ten women in my playgroup gave birth to their first child by c-section. That’s sixty percent! YIKES!

Confessions of a Sleep Training Mommy

I dread sleep training. Mainly, it's because I am a gigantic softie. I tend to talk a big game, encouraging my mom-friends to find a method that works for them, citing the importance of a child's ability to fall asleep independently. That is important. Don't get me wrong. Deep down I really believe that children - even older babies - should be able to self-soothe. But when my daughter cries, I feel guilty.

Wait, let me amend that. I feel guilty when she cries because I am sleep training her. If she cries in the middle of the night I don't feel guilt - just a mysterious mix of compassion and irritation. It's confusing!

Hello, Neighbor!

One of my greatest blessings in life has been my relationships with my neighbors.  Now that I am a parent, I wonder how to create similar opportunities for neighborly friendships for my family.  As a start, you clearly need neighbors!  Good weather seems to help, too.  Now that the chill has left the air in Chicago - hopefully until next autumn - we are starting to actually see our neighbors again: no more driving straight into the garage or hurrying to the door with hunched shoulders trying to outrun the wind/snow/freezing rain. As our lawns return to their green glory and the trees begin to bud, we're finding ourselves outside, having aimless conversations with folks who almost went missing (like us!) during the colder months.

A Delicious Decision

Today I was faced with a glorious decision.  My wonderful in-laws are in town, and my husband had taken the kids and his parents out for a little excursion.  It's not that I didn't want to go, it's just that now that we have two kids, we can't fit four adults and two huge car seats in our smallish car. So I stayed behind, presumably to make some headway on the several writing deadlines, all coming fast mid-next week.  Sitting at the computer in a silent house, I began thinking, "I should really go for a run right now."  I have another deadline that is getting bigger by the day: I'm signed up to run the Nike Women's Marathon in October.  My weekly mileage is woefully low, and it seemed like the perfect moment to steal a few guilt-free miles.  That is, until I began thinking about a nap.  You know, that thing our young children get to do that recharges their kiddie batteries?

Well, now I was faced with a dilemma.  To exercise or to nap? 

Community Supported Agriculture in the Big City

Not too long ago, my husband and I took advantage of the watch-it-now-! feature on Netflix.  I was hoping for a cuddle-worthy romantic comedy or perhaps an episode of Glee.  No such luck: it was documentary night.  He had just finished reading In Defense of Food by Michael Pollan and was chattering on about eating mostly plants and decreasing our meat consumption.  We agreed on watching Food, Inc., since we'd been hearing a lot about it from friends. So after a few minutes of fiddling with various cords to connect the laptop to the television, the enlightenment started.  I have to admit, I was riveted.  Of course we were disturbed (isn't that the point of almost every documentary?), but I was also completely grossed out. This yuk-factor motivated me to search for alternatives to the conventional meat we buy at our local grocery store.  I had heard about Community Supported Agriculture, or CSA, from various friends, but only for produce.  Finding a CSA that offered meat in the Chicago area took a little more digging, but after a bit of research we decided to join Walnut Acres Family Farm.

CSAs are smaller farms that grow produce, or in the case of Walnut Acres, meat, poultry, and eggs. The cattle are full time pasture animals, eating mostly grass and hay. This was a relief to hear after contemplating the conventional method of cattle farming.  It seems that "conventional" methods have become quite complicated and, in reality, unnatural.  I know I have almost zero awareness of where our food comes from and the effort it takes to provide it.