The Official Silicon Valley Guy Handbook

My first boyfriend was a computer geek. (So were the second, fourth, sixth, seventh, and so forth...) Not that I wasn't a geek, especially since I met him at a computer BBS social event, but he was already in college studying to be a geek while working as a geek and spending his evenings as a geek - when he wasn't playing in his band, "Lost Carrier". (Yeah, only geeks get that one.) I was still in high school thinking I had options, not realizing my fate had already been sealed.

My first boyfriend also had a pretty good sense of humor and one day (circa 1988) he showed me one day this book he had - The Official Silicon Valley Guy Handbook, by Patty Bell and Doug Myrland. I don't remember much about the book, but essentially this was a precursor to Dilbert. The guy on the cover had a pocket protector, wore glasses, polyester pants and a button-up shirt and tie, and carried a briefcase. In the background is a huge computer. His motto: "Hey, pleasure unit! Punch my code!" My boyfriend thought that was hilarious and I must admit I laughed pretty hard myself.  My sister moved to Silicon Valley the same year that book was written to start studying at Stanford and although I had traveled to the Bay Area many times as a child, I didn't start paying much attention to Silicon Valley "culture" until I began visiting her here, and I didn't really absorb any of it myself until I moved here in '95.

It is interesting to see how things have changed - or not changed, actually. Today's Silicon Valley Guy is more the jeans and t-shirt variety, Blackberry or Treo bulging in the pocket, laptop bag slung over the shoulder. He's probably text messaging his pleasure unit - oh, is that supposed to be me? Anyway, if I were to update the Handbook today, I'd modify it to talk about hybrid vehicles, wireless filled smart houses (that are empty, of course, because Silicon Valley guys don't have time to furnish them), their mommyblogger wives (and ex-wives), their kids who have their own computers by age 2, and rare telecommuting. At the core, I'm happy the heart of the Silicon Valley Guy is still the same and it's just his gadgets that have evolved. It's nice to have some continuity, even if it is for poking fun. Besides, Silicon Valley guys are actually pretty cool - geeks or no geeks. ...

Sarah Granger, geek and writer, takes pride in being a Silicon Valley girl (note the capital V).