In A Rich Man's World

"Money, money, money...must be funny...in a rich man's world." - Abba

In the quest for posts about money, we SV Moms discovered that most of us feel as if we don't have enough - myself included. But one of the questions posed was: what's it like for those who do? I can tell you one thing for sure: they still gawk at the cost of housing in the Bay Area.

I've had the pleasure of knowing a handful of people who are technically billionaires and several who are multimillionaires. Those that I've known over the years - I'm sorry to disappoint - are all kind, intelligent, extremely generous, hard-working people. Maybe no more so than you or I, but I can't say anything bad about them. In fact, without their incredible philanthropy, many of the causes and arts we hold dear, like pure scientific research and local orchestras, would not be able to survive.

I'm not sure why, but I harbored the incorrect assumption as a child that all financially successful were mean and miserly. Then one day, I looked around and realized many of my neighbors were quite wealthy and were some of the nicest, smartest, most confident people I'd ever met. (For those of you who know the reference, I grew up down the street from the man who wrote What's the Matter With Kansas?.) While in college, I became friends with a few people who later fared quite well in the dotcom era and fit a similar profile.

So what's it like for those who have money? I've heard stories about private jet trips around the world, buying houses in cash, parties with Donald Trump and supermodels, having race horses as a hobby, collecting priceless works of art, second homes with multiple acres, and vacationing on yachts. I know, we're all feeling really sorry for them now. On the flip side, however, are the enormous insurance costs, realistic security fears (concerns for kidnappings and ransom of family members), constant media scrutiny and incessant panderers at every turn. Everyone wants something from them - their time, their endorsement, and/or their dollars.

Just because they're wealthy doesn't mean they blow money right and left, however. These people didn't become rich by squandering cash; they know how to be frugal, how to negotiate and get a good deal. I remember one of my friends bartering with the cashier at Just Desserts in Palo Alto for a deal for four pieces of cake. He was honing his skills for negotiating with VCs. Clearly, it worked.

In my experience, people with money also tend to keep their good friends very close. They're not stuffy about who their friends are and they don't discriminate about whether they are also rolling in the dough; on the contrary, they are generous almost to a fault in order to make their friends comfortable so that they may participate in the same activities. They just want to hold onto people they trust. It may be easier for them to connect with others in similar situations, but that's true for most of us. Overall, I'd say we can all learn from those with money - not just in how to make it, but how to make good use of it as well.