A Hundred Things Lighter

We've started a semi-annual tradition. It's semi-annual because I'm not very organized and so we just do it when the timing feels right. It's called the hundred thing challenge, it takes less than an hour, and everyone loves it.

The idea is to gather up a hundred things around the house and just throw them away. It's much easier than it sounds, especially now that I've given myself permission to just let everything be tossed rather than trying to find thoughtful destinations for every item.

This old beanie baby, hmm. maybe it's worth something on eBay? Maybe, maybe not, but I'd rather not let it stay in my house rent-free while I wait to find out.

This little shakey shakey thing could be a good rattle for our baby cousin. Maybe, maybe not, but we're not going to see that baby cousin for two more months, and there's a chance that I'll forget to pack it when we are gearing up to go see him, and I'm certainly not going to go through the hassle of waiting in line at the post office to pay to mail it, so....out it goes as well.

The McDonalds Happy Meal toy that wasn't tied into some beloved movie (because let's face it, the Monsters Inc. toys were among the best ever produced--I drove from drive-thru to drive-thru buying them outright)--? I could trek it in to that vintage store that has the basket of broken action figures by the door, and maybe they'd give me a quarter for it, but I'd have to put several quarters in the meter to park anywhere near that store so....that just wouldn't make good financial sense.

Thing is, I've always wanted to get rid of these kinds of things but have been stuck in the 'where should they go?' rut. Salvation Army, Goodwill, the funky consignment shop down the block, neighbor, stoop sale, craigslist...the list exhausts me. My husband would find little piles of stuff near the front door--my good intentions written all over it. 'Look what I've finally decided to get rid of!' I'd exclaim...but then the pile would sit there for a few weeks while I fretted over the various options for the proper passing-on of stuff...and then one of my daughters would find a use for the My Pretty Pony comb, my son would decide he likes Spiderman again, and one by one everything would be re-absorbed.

I was overjoyed then when I came across an article mentioning 'green guilt' and 'eco-anxiety.' Turns out 1 in 5 of us suffers from this new form of psychosis; an almost paralyzing fear that we're not doing enough for the environment. It goes on to point out that many of us do ridiculous things to assuage that guilt--one woman in Chicago almost started shredding computer paper to use as toilet paper before she came to her senses.

I haven't suffered from any panic attacks yet, but have developed a real knack for beating myself up for forgetting to bring a canvas bag into the grocery store. The other day I stood in line at Trader Joe's and watched the man scan my sea salt brownies, pirates treasure, citrus shampoo, etc. I could see my car in the parking lot, and knew it had at least seven canvas bags in the trunk. I tried to picture what it would feel like to say 'can you wait a minute?' and dash OUT of the store (could I have left my four year old behind? she certainly would have slowed me down) to grab the bags and bring them in to try to, I don't know, save one more plastic bush somewhere? Instead I opted to spend a few bucks on yet ANOTHER 'save the earth' bag that will join the others that I always forget about in the trunk.

I get green guilt, I understand eco-anxiety...and I have got to give myself permission to step out of all the greenness madness every now and then. So, with that in mind, I've decided it doesn't make sense to hold onto things for fear that I'm not recycling everything properly--and now I'm free to toss the junk.

We do the hundred thing challenge every few months. It would be cute if I were the kind of mom who could remember to do this on the hundredth and two hundredth and three hundredth day of each year, whatever those days might be. It'd be adorable to tie this in with the hundredth day of school. But I'm not and I don't.

Everything counts: a bent paper clip is one thing, a marker-covered baby doll is another...a toothbrush that's been used long after its magical blue bristles have turned white is a thing, so is the nineteenth unsharpened pencil...a never-used vinyl coin-purse is one thing, an undeveloped disposable camera from a wedding in the 90s counts too, so does some old flavored mustard with a crusty nozzle. We toss it all in a plastic bag, knot it securely to cut back on last minute pardons, and throw it all away.

Of course it's always hard for me, later on, when a neighbor mentions that her son loves the Lion King and I picture the little Rafiki figure in a landfill somewhere...or when the missing pink sock shows up days after we threw out its more visible mate, but we can't all be perfect all of the time.

What we can be is a hundred things lighter, every now and then.

An original post for NYCMOMSBLOG.com. Adelaide's other essays can be found at oneofthosehorriblemoms.blogspot.com