DC Metro Moms

Expecting

... cross posted from our sister site, Chicago Moms Blog.
I am a girl with expectations. I always have been. Expectations of both myself and of those around me. I expect myself to perform at certain levels. I expect to complete things that I set my mind to. I expect to not let people down and to live up to the things they assume will be true of me. Exhausting at times, but just how I am wired.

Well, here I sit. Three weeks away from my newest son being born. And I am once again full of thoughts and tasks that need addressing. I am nesting, I am reflecting and processing... I am expecting.

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Divorce Happens, Kindness is on Purpose.

... cross posted from our sister site, Chicago Moms Blog.

With examples like A-Rod and Christie Brinkley, columns about celebrity divorces are kept full of plenty of dish. Salacious details captivate millions, and speculation is practically a national pastime.

But the reality of divorce is agonizing and personal.

Four years ago, my partner and I were facing a breakup. The reasons aren't important, except to note that neither of us wanted to give up on our relationship - the circumstances just kept throwing us against the rocks until we were battered, bruised, and resigned.

Click HERE to continue reading at Chicago Moms Blog.

I Just Realized How Complicated This Whole Motherhood Thing Is

... cross posted from our sister site, Chicago Moms Blog.

Yesterday my good friend and colleague announced her pregnancy at work. There's something about a pregnant woman that draws out every mother's stories of her own experiences. I spent yesterday hearing pregnancy and breastfeeding stories dating from the 1970s to the present.

As for me personally, I was a huge ball of nerves my entire pregnancy. I got the positive pregnancy test on a Friday, and I spent the following weekend sobbing. Even though the pregnancy was completely planned, I just couldn't accept the major changes that were about to happen in my life. I worried how motherhood would affect my marriage, my career, my friendships, and just my life in general.

Click HERE to continue reading at Chicago Moms Blog.

Pride for Iowa

... cross posted from our sister site, Chicago Moms Blog.

The news coverage came on CNN as a “Severe Weather” update. We saw that Iowa City was flooding. It was still raining. We called my extended family for the crisis-check. You know, the call that says: “I’m concerned, are you OK?” Everyone was “fine” and we wished them well, offered them to come to stay with us in Chicago if need be, and said we would help in anyway we could.

It wasn’t until this weekend, when talking to my Iowa born-and-raised cousin, that my heart filled with sadness and pride for the entire state. “Susie lost her whole house, her son’s room is floating…we finished grabbing boards and sand bags and she said: ‘Let’s go help Tim, he got it bad’”. Seriously? My cousin explained his shock that she didn’t consider her own desperate situation “bad”. He was calling to help raise money for his brother who had lost EVERYTHING. “What do you mean everything, Anthony? Furniture? Basement?” I asked. “Everything, as in he was out of town, and now has NOTHING.” He clarified. Yikes.

Click here to continue reading on Chicago Moms Blog.

Will Wii actually get Fit?

....cross posted from our sister site, Chicago Moms Blog.

Caption: Me in a sari and a friend at an event, two years ago (pre-baby). You can't tell from the photo, but the back definitely bares quite a bit of stomach flesh.

A few days ago my mother called, stressed out that I wouldn't lose the thirty extra pounds of pregnancy weight in time for my little sister's wedding this October. I'm a matron of honor, you see, which means I'll be in the wedding photos, wearing a sari. A sari is lovely and elegant, especially if you are tall and slim. But it is not a forgiving piece of clothing. It actually bares your stomach!!! At a formal event!!! For photos!!! My mom suggested that maybe if I couldn't get up off my ass and exercise myself, it might be time to hire a personal trainer. (My mom would never actually use the word 'ass,' but you get the gist.) For four months, once a week, that'd be about $250/month, or $1000. The family might even spring for it out of the wedding budget if necessary.

Okay, so that was embarrassing. I don't think I could stand to tell my little sister that she can't have flowers at her wedding because her big sister just couldn't seem to get her ass in gear. So a renewed commitment to exercise. I'm still very conflicted on the whole dieting idea, but a regular amount of daily exercise and a more active lifestyle is pretty clearly a greater good. Even if I don't lose.....

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Missing You

....cross posted from our sister site, Chicago Moms Blog.

They would sit around the table, in tan pants and button-downs. And they would tell me about the plan. And argue about the plan. And I would sit, serenely. Listening. Bending, when need be. And ultimately, nodding. Saying "Yes, this is what we will do. It will be done. You will do your part." And they would, ultimately, nod and say "Yes. Despite all my arguments, despite my enthusiasm one way or another, I agree."

Then we would shuffle in a bundle out the door. Chit chat and empty coffee cups. Maybe head on down to the bar for a drink or over to that Chinese place. I would tug my Citibank card from my wallet, the one with no limit, to pay.

Or sometimes a vendor would, waggling his fingers at me to say he had the tab. No worries.

At the front door, home, I would kick off my heels. One, then the other. Never pantyhose or nylons. I would drop my laptop bag with a soft thud. Scoop my hair up into a scrunchie.

Click HERE to continue reading this post on Chicago Moms Blog.....

Whoopi Challenges Denise Richards

...cross posted from our sister site, Chicago Moms Blog.

Did anyone see The View this week?

Sparks crackled between host Whoopi Goldberg and actress Denise Richards, who was there to promote her new E! reality show.

Allegedly, Richards and her cherubs will be featured on the show.  Her daughters are two and four years old.  Their father is Charlie Sheen.  Some feel her decision to include her kids on-camera is exploitative.  Whoopi questioned Ms. Richards' judgment.

Bristling, Ms. Richards countered that several family reality shows already exist, such as TLC's "Jon & Kate Plus Eight," and "Keeping Up with the Kardashians."

Click Here to continue reading this post on Chicago Moms Blog.....

When Enough Is Enough

....cross posted from our sister site, Chicago Moms Blog.

I was watching Oprah yesterday when Barbara Walters, of all people (I can't stand her), says something that just struck me to my core. She was talking about her special needs sister and how hard it is for parents of children with autism and that, although they love their children and would do anything for them, sometimes they think "it's just too much."

It's just too much.

I tear up as I even type that right now because really, what is so difficult about saying, "it's just too much" ? Why do I feel like I can't say it out loud when that's really how I feel? And so I did. I said it out loud. And it felt good. I am not the parent of a child with autism. I have been through my share of rough times. But it's just life in general right now that is overwhelming me. Whether it be as a Mother, wife, friend, or plain ol' human being. And I feel like I should pull up my big girl panties and just get over it. Toughen up. Get through the day. But I'm wiped out. I'm exhausted. I'm barely making it through the day and I have to say that this is no way to live, just barely getting by. I've had enough.

Click Here to continue reading this post on Chicago Moms Blog....

Wrong Time for the Right Time

....cross posted from our sister site, Chicago Moms Blog.

The thing I miss most since becoming a parent?

Nookie.

You know, sex.

When we first brought that baby home, melting our hearts with his huge blue eyes, it was the farthest thing on my mind.

It's 7 years later. Enough already.

He works an early day so he can spend the rest of it with us. Which means the alarm goes off at 5:45AM  and I convulse with shock. Every morning. 'Cuz I'm slow that way.

I write freelance. Which means I stay up after the kid (and man) have gone to sleep, tip-tapping furiously away. Yo Yo Ma's sprightly tones drifting through the speakers.

But the funny part? I used to be THE Morning Lark. And him? The Night's Original Owl.

A week or so goes by and we'll look at each other like starved ocelots desperate for some of Fuddrucker's finest.

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Why Is Texas Punishing the Victims in the FLDS Case?

....cross posted from our sister site, Chicago Moms Blog.

I've been watching the case of the children removed from the Texas compound Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints with a heavy heart and conflicting opinions. As much as I abhor the practices of the FLDS community, my heart breaks for those mothers and children being separated. At least, I told myself, they're letting the smallest children stay with their mommies.

Today, they took the mothers away from the babies ages 12 months and up.

I don't like this group, a radical sect disavowed by the Mormon church that embraces polygamy and under-aged marriage and motherhood. I don't think we should just live and let live when it comes to communities where teenage girls are abused in this way.

I read Jon Krakauer's "Under the Banner of Heaven" and I have seen FLDS escapee Carolyn Jessop speak about her experiences. What she describes is child abuse, not just a cultural difference.

Yet I cannot understand how separating toddlers -- some still nursing -- from their mothers is going to help them. I cannot imagine what kind of experience hundreds of children had in that coliseum without their parents.

Click Here to continue reading this post on Chicago Moms Blog.....