Slumber Party is an Oxymoron

For my daughter's 9th birthday, she wanted to make her slumber party debut. This wouldn't be the first time she had a friend over to spend the night. However, it would be the first time she invited ten girls, and all of their giggles, to camp out on our living room floor.

My daughter came to me armed with a power point presentation that she created for the occasion and a simple schedule in mind.

1. Swim
2. Have a Talent Show
3. Eat Pizza & Cake
4. Open Presents
5. Stay Up All Night

I chuckled as I read the last item because I was sure that I knew better.  I, being the wise, old mother that I am, already knew the secret formula. (Hours of swimming + a full belly = Sleep) I also had an ace up my sleeve. (If all else fails, place them in the hot tub for 15 minutes. Sleep shall not elude!)

I agreed to her terms and sent out the invitations. Afterward, I didn't give the party much thought. I mean, I hosted and attended TONS of slumber parties growing up. They couldn't have changed that much, right? You gobble up junk food, talk about boys, dance, play with your older sister's make up and pass out watching a  C. Thomas Howell movie. It would be a piece of cake, literally.

The day of the sleepover, my daughter and I picked up her birthday cake, rearranged the living room furniture to make room for all the sleeping bags and assembled the party favors. We were all set. Or so I thought.

I happen to have forgotten to add one small , but very necessary, item to our last minute shopping list - a pair of earplugs.

Some things have changed in the last 25 years. Children become bored more easily, cake icing has highly increased levels of sugar and girls voices are much, much, much louder. I can only liken the experience to trying to scream over a very long rock concert.

Looking back, my first indication to the night I had in store for me should have been when the parents dropped off their girls. One by one, each mother and/or father remarked on my bravery. I shrugged it off then but now I know better.

Sure, we followed the schedule. What we didn't allot for were meltdowns and sugar highs & lows. Of course, I used my secret weapon, the hot tub. Apparently, cake icing contains an ingredient which makes children impervious to the effects of warm water and massaging bubbles after 10 pm. Certainly, I tried to settle them down with a movie but the sight of the Jonas Brothers singing in Camp Rock only took the shrieking to a whole new level.

How was I to know?

Sleep finally came at 5am after the ringleader, my own flesh and blood, finally lost the battle with her eyelids. Those parents who called me brave were right on the money. There is no sleep in a sleepover and no slumber in a slumber party.  My daughter had a blast, though, so I guess my personal discomfort was worth it.

Planning a slumber party for your little darling? Read and learn...and take two aspirin every 4 hours until the parents pick up the next morning.

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You can find Kimberly in Petroville where she lives and writes daily.
An original DC Metro Moms post.