Terrorist plot foiled thanks to Reagan National Airport Security

A subversive terror threat to our nation’s safety was stopped thanks to airport security screening  this past Sunday. Two major terrorists on the Homeland Security watch list posing as a husband and wife traveling with their toddler sumo child were detained at airport security, possessing a potentially volatile weapon in their carry-on luggage. Witnesses reported that both terrorists appeared incredulous that their bag was being searched, as if caught off-guard. The female suspect, appearing to be wearing a 5-month pregnancy body suit under her clothes was overheard saying, “But she can’t sleep without it! It’s an Aquarium toy for god’s sake!”

The weapon in question appeared to be a bulky, rectangular object filled with liquid, clearly against security regulations. It also contained 4 large D batteries and was cleverly decorated with fish and shell toys.

A representative from airport security was unavailable for comment.