Chicago Moms Blog

Au Pair, Of Course!

We have tried every childcare situation out there. Standard daycare, in-home daycare, nannies, babysitters and after-school care. For the past 10 months, though, we've had an au pair, and I have to say that this is the best solution yet.

We do the standard au pair program which includes 45 hours of care a week. There is an upfront fee of $7,345, and then we pay her a weekly fee of $160 (the actual cost is $157.95, but that just seems tacky). When you average it all out, the weekly cost is $309. (less than $7/hour). Yes, our food costs have gone up (but part of that is the economy). And yes, we have someone living with us, but it's been terrific.

We are lucky to have a good house layout for an au pair.

Pride for Our School (and some anger for those who don't get it)

  The journey to our local neighborhood school was a very long one. Because the public school system in Chicago is so erratic and uneven, we spent a lot of time and effort trying to find the right place for our daughter. She took the gifted and classical placement tests and we also applied to about 20 other public schools in the city. Some were magnets, some were highly regarded neighborhood schools that accept a small number of children via lottery. Ultimately, Dylan was accepted into one gifted school, one classical school and one magnet school. We turned them all down, though, and opted to go with the neighborhood school just three blocks from our home. One year after that decision, I am happier than ever that we made the choice we did. However, I also feel quite a bit of anger.

We chose our neighborhood school for a number of reasons. First, we love the principal. He is young, dynamic, passionate and tough. Second, we love the proximity! Nothing beats walking three blocks to school, and being close by makes it easier for us to participate in after school activities (such as book

I Expect Squirrels and Rats, But Cougars??

Cougar
Originally uploaded by ucumari.

Just this week I posted about my neighborhood and how much I love it. I still believe that it's THE best place to raise a family in this city. That said, I'd prefer we keep the cougars out, OK?

I was relaxing on my couch last night, organizing the recipes on my blog and half-watching HGTV when I got an alert that I had a new Facebook post. The post said this, "So it is my understanding that there was a COUGAR shot, what? Two blocks from your house today? And how is THAT going???"

Um, what? I quickly turned to Google, and discovered that YES, a COUGAR was shot two blocks from my house. Just 1/2 a block from my daughter's school. In the alley behind my friend Kate's house!

As a mother, I worry about my kids when they are out and about. I worry about the cars that drive too fast down Roscoe Street. I worry about older bullies who might give them a hard time. I worry that the ice cream man will encourage cavities and poor eating habits. But this? I never worried about this. I can honestly say that I never worried about a cougar roaming my neighborhood, jumping six foot tall fences and terrorizing all in its vicinity.

Expect the unexpected.

Original Chicago Moms Blog post

Ma Village, Let Me Show You It

Recently, CityMama wrote an ode to her small city, waxing poetic about all of reasons she is so content and happy to be living there. Well, the weather in early April in Chicago doesn't come close to matching the weather she has in the Silicon Valley, but in an effort to get myself through these last chilly days, I thought I'd talk a little bit about all of the reasons that I DO love living where I do, which is the city neighborhood of Roscoe Village. Many of my fellow Chicago Mom Bloggers are in the suburbs, and there is certainly nothing wrong with that. Heck, I grew up in the suburbs! But, I love the city lifestyle, and being in Roscoe Village offers the best of all worlds. Here's why:

Cyberstalking the help

I am "friends" with all of our babysitters on Facebook. When I tell people about this, they are kind of surprised, but I think it's smart of me (not to brag or anything). After being blindsided by a drunk nanny last year, I like to be prepared.

I see some crazy things. The college student who watched Dylan for a few hours every afternoon last summer? Her profile picture showcased one of her girlfriends licking her face. Our occasional Saturday night sitter? She volunteered to bring the "guac and weed" to a party. Neither one of these revelations stopped me from hiring these people, but it keeps me more aware. (And I certainly don't encourage face licking and/or weed smoking when they are at my house.)

It's All About Me

If you asked me to describe myself, you'd probably hear words like, "independent," "secure," and "opinionated." However, I've come to the realization lately, that despite my conviction that I am all of these things, I've actually started slipping into a more murky space. I've become less opinionated. I've become less independent. And, as a result of those two, I've become less secure.

When the new year rolled around, I didn't want to make any specific resolutions (beyond some food ones, of course - most of which I've already broken), but I decided to just make some more general changes.

Potty Training, Pre-School and Mommy Madness

I do it to myself all of the time. I create drama, headaches and extra stress. And, I think I'm doing it again now, but I have to get my thoughts down on paper (on screen?) to sort it all out. My son Max is almost 2.5, and he spends most of his days with our au pair. Two mornings a week, he goes to a small, in-home daycare for a few hours. I love the place, but it's become time for him to move on. He is the oldest one there, which isn't ideal for him developmentally at this point. He needs big kids around, for a variety of reasons.

So, I was overjoyed last month, when the director of my daughter's formal Montessori preschool emailed me with the news that she'd have room for Max this month. And therein lies my stress.

Tips for Airline Travel with Kids (especially of the toddler variety)

  GoGo Babyz 
  Originally uploaded by Foodmomiac

My husband is temporarily living and working in London, so he wasn't able to travel with us to New York on Saturday (he will fly in and meet us here on Wednesday, just in time for Thanksgiving). So, as I've found myself doing way too many times before, I traveled on the plane, by myself, with both kids.

It was actually OK, though. I've kind of mastered it. It's not FUN, but it's do-able. Here, then, are my tips for a successful trip:

Dinners, Dairy and Drinks: A Chicago Moms Blog Night Out

A couple of weeks ago, several of us from Chicago Moms Blog did something radical. We met. In person. For a few glorious hours, we tucked our cell phones and Blackberries into our purses, kept the diaper bags and travel case of wipes and baggies of broken crayons in the car and had real live conversation. Over food. And wine. Oh, and aprons.

Yes, there were aprons. We met up at Super Suppers in Northbrook for an event hosted by 3-A-Day, a part of the National Dairy Council, to assemble and sample dairy-friendly dinners. While I wouldn't have thought getting out of the house for an evening with my friends to still make a dinner (or six) would be so fun and freeing, it was. Here's why:

Blog Action Day - What I'm Doing

Today is Blog Action Day (just in case you are living under a rock and don't know. or if you're my mom and don't read any blogs other than mine.)

So, for the under-rock dwellers (and my family), here is a summary of Blog Action Day, direct from their website:

On October 15th, bloggers around the web will unite to put a single important issue on everyone’s mind - the environment. Every blogger will post about the environment in their own way and relating to their own topic. Our aim is to get everyone talking towards a better future.

I figured that the best thing I could do today is to share with you the changes that I have made to better the environment. If you have your own blog, you should sign up on the site and write your own post about the environment. If you don't have your own blog, feel free to tell me about your green-ness in my comments. I'm always looking for ways to get greener, and I know that many of my friends (and readers) are seeking the same thing.

So, here is what I'm doing:

Bringing Families Back to the Table

  Yay! 
  Originally uploaded by Foodmomiac

Last night, we gathered up the family (including our au pair Paty, the newest member), and headed to a big event at Crust: Eat Real. Crust is the first certified organic restaurant in the Midwest, and we had wanted to try it for a while. This event was the perfect opportunity.

The evening was a fundraiser for an organization called Purple Asparagus. Here is the mission of Purple Asparagus:

What happened to the simple Brazilian?

No, I'm not referring to our au pair from Sao Paolo who is scheduled to arrive next week.

I'm referring to the bikini wax.

Back when I started getting waxed (in the 80s) (OMG I'm old) (and hairy), it was very simple. There were the simple facial waxes (lip, brow) and then the legs. You could do half leg, full leg and/or bikini. Just plain old bikini. You could be a modest person and still get the bikini wax. Your underwear stayed on your body. VERY SIMPLE.

I'm not sure when things changed. Some might blame it on the famous Sex and the City episode.  I think that is about the time that I heard about the Brazilian. It just so happened that just after that aired, a friend of mine started attending beauty school. As part of her training, she went to a local salon and got a Brazilian wax. She encouraged me to do the same. And so I did. And it was slightly awkward, but not terrible.

But then I moved to Chicago. I don't know if this is a big city thing, or if it is just the way things are in 2007, but all I can say is that Lee at the Southport Nail Bar has seen more of me than nearly everyone. Possibly even more than my OB.

Here is the menu of Bikini Waxing Services available at Nail Bar (the first set of parentheses are written on their menu, the second set are my commentary):

Kids Menus - Yay or Nay?

Cuban food!
Originally uploaded by Foodmomiac.

I am totally torn on the issue of kids menus. My snobby food half wants to agree with the recent NY Times article that derides them for making "blandly tasty foodstuff ... the de facto official nibble of our young."

My overworked, fed-up mom half can totally appreciate the benefits of the kids menu. As I wrote about just yesterday, sometimes kids menus can be a wonderful thing.

My kids are great eaters (this photo is Max eating Cuban food at Cafe 28 tonight), but sometimes a five year old just wants a chicken nugget. Thoughts?? Do you guys like kids menus? If you are at a restaurant without a kids menu, what do you do? (We usually order the kids' dinners from the appetizer section.)

A Letter to My Landlord

Dear J. Landlord,

Overall, we are glad that we chose this apartment to live in for our first year in Chicago. The street is amazing, with its very own park, terrific families, and proximity to Dinkel's Bakery and Whole Foods. That said, we are very happy to be leaving.

Have you wondered at all why the tenants in both of your apartments have now vacated the premises? I imagine you think it has nothing to do with you. Well, J. Landlord, let me tell you this; it has nearly EVERYTHING to do with you.

As a parting gift, I thought it would be nice to provide you with a list of all of the things you might want to know moving forward.

1. Common areas are YOUR responsibility. Are you shocked? I think you must be, since you seem to have given no thought to this over the past 10 months. That is why there are still salt crystals in the vestibule. And lint permanently glued to the laundry room floor.
2. Speaking of the laundry room, remember that month when the washer only put out steaming hot water? I do. It ruined my jacket.
3. When a tenant emails you with a list of issues, the proper response is not, "OK, well let me know if any of those start to affect your standard of living."
4. You might want to buy your roommate an ashtray. We did kind of admire the heights to which his cigarette butt sculpture reached this year, but if I want modern art, I'll head to a museum. We noticed the butts disappeared when your dad came to visit. Funny!
5. If you are going to have the gall to tell me to stop my children from running in the apartment, you MIGHT want to consider not standing outside hollering, "DUDE!!" at 2am.
6. OH, here's a good one. Remember when I realized that we had been paying YOUR electric and gas for four months? That was super annoying.

So, thank you J. Landlord. Thank you for the memories. It's been real.

Green City Market - At Long Last

  Dylan with her Living Lettuce 
  Originally uploaded by Foodmomiac.

Well, we finally made it. Dylan and I dropped Max off at his daycare at 7:15 and made it to the market by 7:30. I had never been on a Wednesday, but I really liked it. It was not as hectic as a Saturday morning, which was a very good thing.

We didn't have much time, so we had to rush through, but we got some great items:

- Green garlic
- Spring onions
- Asparagus
- Living lettuce (as seen in the above photo)
- Beet sprouts
- Bloody Mary Mix (so good and spicy, with lots of jalapeno)
- Roasted Tomato Pasta Sauce

We also had a delicious breakfast of freshly prepared crepes made with organic whole wheat batter. I chose butter and sugar. Dylan had strawberry jam (though she only wanted the filling - whose kid is this???)

It felt so luxurious and summery to sit on the grass eating a warm crepe while bugs buzzed around and people shopped for produce. I can't wait to go back next week.

Green City Market Plans Foiled - ARGH!

Today marked the opening day of this season's Green City Market. I had a foolproof plan in place. Max was all set to go to daycare an hour early, and Dylan and I were going to venture to the market just after it opened to say hi to the farmers and buy some fresh spring produce (asparagus and arugula are both great right now, and I was looking forward to both of those). I was then going to drop her at school and still make it to work before 9.

Alas, Max woke up this morning with a fever, so we are stuck inside with no produce to our name. But, the market is open this Saturday as well, and every Wednesday and Saturday after that through the fall, so I will make it soon. For pictures of the market last fall, click here. (I will take new ones this year as soon as we get there.)

Revealing the Double Standard

Have you read I Don’t Know How She Does It? It’s the wildly popular mommy-lit book about a London mom (mum?) who works full time. Her kids and husband are neglected. Her life is out of control. She is the only one who does anything around the house. She is just a mess. This book really frightened me. I read it about a week before I started my own full-time job, and I worried that when I started working again, I’d turn into that mom.

Now that I’ve been working for almost three months, I am happy to report that I’m still a good mother (phew!). Sure, I’ve had my moments (sending my daughter to school with a sore throat because I had an important client meeting that I just couldn’t miss comes to mind), but overall, I think I’m managing okay.

There is one part of the book, though, that really rings true, and I’m wondering if the other working moms out there agree. Kate, the protagonist, is at a work meeting, and one of her colleagues (a man) excuses himself, explaining that he needs to attend his daughter’s swimming gala. The meeting attendees (excepting Kate) all smile at each other. One woman mouths the word, “Sweet.” Another woman says, “Oh, how marvelous, Andrew! You’re so hands on!”

This is the excerpt that really got me, though:

“Man announces he has to leave the office to be with his child for short recreational burst and is hailed as selfless doting paternal role model. Woman announces she has to leave the office to be with child who is on sickbed and is damned as disorganized, irresponsible, and Showing Insufficient Commitment.”

I feel this way when I need to come in late, leave early, or stay home. Is there really this much of a double standard or am I just overly sensitive?

Cross Posted on Silicon Valley Moms Blog (sister site of Chicago Moms Blog)