I 'm spending my summer staycation at Club Med Chicago. That's Med as in Medicine. Yep, I'm lounging my sweet summer days away in hospitals and doctors' offices. Needless to say, at this Club Med I won't be splashing around in pristine waters, instead I’ll be drowning in medical bills.
Our Club Medicine adventures started the day my boys got out of school. DH spent that day at home
lounging languishing on the couch, feverish and achy, not to mention barely lucid, which I learned when I called to tell him my car had been sideswiped in the school parking lot.
But that's for a future post. By the time the boys and I arrived home ready to begin summer break, DH could barely stand upright.
Though I’m not one to rush out to doctors, we called DH’s physician who advised us to head to the ER. DH summoned his strength for a much-needed shower while I pieced together childcare.
My father-in-law met us shortly after our arrival at the ER, leaving DH and I to experience our first childless evening at Club Medicine. To be fair, I somewhat enjoyed it. The room had a television and I joked around with the doctors and nurses who often seemed more interested in my hot little XO laptop than in my big, feverish husband. I helped myself to complimentary juice, tuna and turkey sandwiches, and cookies in the ER’s “guest room” and ate them shamelessly in front of DH, who would not have been allowed to partake in the fine, free cuisine even if he hadn't been in excruciating abdominal pain.
But he did get (okay, was required) to partake an entire bottle of barium in preparation for his CT scan. Then, after an X-ray and being prodded and poked by cute young residents of both genders, he was wheeled up to a luxurious guest suite.
It was a semi-private room fitted with a built-in roommate suffering from a variety on noncontagious ailments. The man had an awful and curious snore. Each time he exhaled it sounded like a dozen loud burps. Also there was an elderly woman on the floor who tried to escape, and a false fire alarm. So, yes, his stay was full of exotic adventures.
As I type, I’m in the waiting area of Children’s Memorial Hospital with my eight-year-old, who is awaiting his first MRI. The MRI results of will likely lead to another trip or two to Children’s later this summer.
Not to leave out my ten-year-old, next week we're headed to the allergist, which may lead us to cancel the boy's scheduled adenoidectomy, or maybe the visit will motivate us to send him for the sleep study I've been putting off.
As for me, my summer fun may come in the form of yet another shot in the spine to alleviate pain from a herniated disc. I may go under the knife, too. What the hell, now that we've met our $5,000 deductible, our health insurance benefits will finally kick in and our summer at Club Medicine can really get rolling.
Photo: My boy received this branded bottle of water plus animal crackers and a stuffed animal as parting gifts from Children's. All DH got was a bottle of a generic soap/shampoo combo and a nail file.
Original post to Chicago Moms Blog.