Biting off more than I can chew
My days are planned out for me before I even wake up in the morning. I have a list of to-do's in my mind that never seem to get done. Let me re-phrase that. I have "multiple" to-do lists in my mind. It doesn't help much for me to write things down because I end up ignoring them anyway. My brain isn't very happy with me and I'm physically worn out. I'm biting off more than I can chew, in a sense.
I've always been a busy-body. I don't remember a time when I've ever really been bored or not had something to do. I always say that I have a lot of pent up creative energy and can never figure out what it truly is that I want to do. So I do little things, a lot of little things, in the hopes that one of these little things will become my "niche". For the longest time, I have been trying to figure out what my talent is. I've gone on thinking that I really don't have a specific talent. Not sure why I think that we all should have one but that's just the way I think.
Shouldn't I have a stable career and know just where I fit in by age 30? That's what I thought for all of these years. Maybe that's the problem, I've always been employed and had a steady, predictable income. That was the norm for me, my modus operandi, if you will. If anything changed, my entire qi was thrown off. Stepping outside of my comfort zone has been a real challenge for me. One that I'm not sure I've handled all that well. Sometimes, I feel that I'm viewed as an under-achiever and other times, I feel like I'm finally free. Free from feeling suffocated by what others expect of me and free to explore what really makes me, me.
So, I've created my very own to-do lists. Problem is, now I am having a hard time keeping up with them. I feel like I need to keep pushing myself and finding my hidden talent, if there is such a thing. I guess I'll just keep biting until I feel full.
*Original Chicago Moms Blog post.
*Amy also bites at MumsThewurd.com, ParentSphere.net, 5MinutesforMom.com and other assorted fruits.
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